Testing 15 Pee Funnels: A Wild Ride

When people learn about this site, I get a lot of questions about testing the devices. While the results of my research are documented all over the site, the actual process itself doesn’t get much description. Based on questions people have asked me, here’s what it was like to test 15 pee funnels. Special thanks to my sister-in-law, who helped me compile the questions!

What was the set-up?

I tested all 15 devices in my backyard in the California summer, and later at my toilet. When I first started using pee funnels, I practiced naked, out by the woodpile. I have a very private backyard. As I got more confident, I tested the devices in different kinds of clothing. (See Clothing.)

I drank SO MUCH GATORADE. It was the summer of deep hydration. I also drank tea, coffee, Diet Coke, and of course water. It was often frustrating having to wait until I needed to pee! If something went wrong, I couldn’t re-test right away. I had to pound more Gatorade and bide my time.

How much did it cost?

It cost $227 for all 15 devices. That does not include the cases I bought for those that did not come with a case. It ALSO does not include the aforementioned Gatorade!

How many times did you pee on yourself?

So many times. I lost count. Pibella, SheWee, GoGirl: looking at you.

I really tried to make each one work, and I succeeded at least once with each device. But the thing about a pee funnel is that you have to be 100% confident it will work every time. I’m not carrying around a device that has even a 10% chance of getting pee all over me.

Do you have any unique challenges?

My hands are not steady. They shake a little. I was very curious to see if this made using a pee funnel difficult or impossible, but it didn’t!

I’m also hopelessly uncoordinated. I was afraid there would be some awkward balancing act or that I’d have difficulty maneuvering. But it was pleasantly straightforward!

I’m making myself sound like a hot mess, which is not inaccurate. Honestly if I can do it, anyone can!

What was the funniest thing that happened while you were practicing?

My neighbor across the back fence was training her dog at the same time as I was learning to use a pee funnel. Often I’d pee in my backyard and hear her yelling, “No! NO!” That was disconcerting. Especially because I couldn’t hear the dog. I assume it was a dog! That could be have been an iguana for all I know.

One time recently I peed in my backyard and I heard her say sweetly, “Good girl for going potty.” That was even more unsettling!

It did occur to me that if the neighbors heard me, they would think it was my husband. He said he’d rat me out if they complained. Chivalry is dead.

What was the biggest disappointment?

Women’s clothing and its lack of zippers! I am a dress-wearer, and when I hike I wear leggings with front-to-back zippers, so I was unprepared for how annoying it was to test stand-to-pee devices in regular leggings. Pants with zippers, like jeans or cargo pants, that’s fine, it’s just another thing to learn how to do. But leggings are a pain.

It’s my sincere hope that women’s outdoors clothing manufacturers come to accommodate pee funnels. Right now, a lot of women’s outdoor brands sell clothing that means women (or trans men) would have to partially undress to pee. This includes cold weather clothing. Why?

What surprised you?

How much I would care about appearance. I had heard that for trans men, it can be really frustrating to have a bright pink stand-to-pee device. I had the opposite effect. I wanted mine to look pretty, not just utilitarian. I wanted cool colors, and a cool matching case!

What was it like to use a pee funnel on your period?

Very cool. You just see a straight stream of blood at first! It’s so metal!

You mention your husband. What did he think of all this?

I asked him that. He said he thought to himself, “Well, that’s Maz and her obsessive projects. Sometimes it’s artwork. Sometimes it’s pissing outside.” He was profoundly disinterested, but not unsupportive.

Ever have a pissing contest?

Hahaha no, I would lose. You don’t get the same projection from a pee funnel as someone with a penis would have.

However, I kind of had a pissing contest with myself when I tested projection. I was in the back yard, and I marked how far I could pee with twigs. That was fun!

What did you learn from telling people about this project?

People either IMMEDIATELY see the point or they don’t. I have now said out loud, multiple times, the sentence, “I’m testing stand-to-pee devices and I’m making a website with my results.” And you either get, “Wow, what a cool project!” or a polite, uncomfortable smile, sometimes accompanied by a “Why?”

There’s also a sizable group of cis women who like the idea of peeing standing up in the abstract, like “Oh, that would be handy,” but who either have no immediate reason to learn or who are afraid of the learning process. If you don’t need to use a pee funnel, then I get not learning, but if it would help and you’re nervous to try—that’s why I made this website. To normalize.

Do you prefer to pee standing up now?

Honestly, only outdoors. I don’t like peeing in toilets much. It’s loud and there’s sometimes a little backsplash.

But outside? Oh my goodness yes. It’s so fun.

Can you do it one-handed?

I can in a little dress. Not if I need to hold fabric out of the way, like in a long dress or jeans! I do know some people can do it one-handed in jeans though.

Do you ever name the devices?

You know, I did at first. My husband teased me for that. He says that men make fun of other men who name their dicks. I said this was totally different! I had a pStyle called “Lady Emma Hamilton,” after Lord Nelson’s mistress. I called my first Sunany “Pink Peter.” But then I got so many it was easier just to say “the SheWee” or “the Freshette” or what have you.

Come clean. Which one do you actually use?

I am wary of endorsing any one particular kind of pee funnel because it’s such a highly personal choice. But what do I, Maz, use? I use a pStyle or a Freshette. Both models have a lot in their favor, and at the end of the day, they are easy and reliable.

When I give new people a stand-to-pee device, I always give them a pStyle. It’s cheap, they can have fun choosing the color, and it is the easiest to use. It’s what I wish my first experience was.

When you started testing pee funnels, did you know you’d be as invested as you are?

No! In the beginning, I figured I’d make a funny write-up for my friends and maybe I’d find one that worked okay. But in my heart, I believed that it would be a messy hassle that only worked so-so. It was a lark.

But then it clicked. It worked. And when I realized women could pee standing up so easily, I was like, I’m gonna tell everybody! Not only women use pee funnels, but I do think women specifically are told that it’s a huge difficult thing to pee without a toilet.

I now know that it doesn’t have to be hard, and that’s why I’m spreading the word. But I do think it’s a little concerning how entrenched this belief is, the belief that some people are just TIED to bathrooms, when there are good options available. Women, trans people, nonbinary people, people with disabilities, and some cis men—all of us deserve a way to pee easily and with dignity.

Thank you to everyone helping me get the word out there!

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