Notes From a Penis-Haver

Throughout my journey with STP devices, my husband (cis male) has been supportive, if bemused. He also cleared up some questions I had, which, in retrospect, must have seemed obvious. Here are some of our conversations; I’m in bold:

Peeing in a toilet seems really splashy, loud and annoying.

Don’t aim for the water. Aim for the side, and put a little tilt on it.

Ugh, I have an STP that works but it’s not pretty. I like things to be pretty!

Save it for when you want to channel raw masculine energy. Go outside, start pissing, and imagine a bald eagle flying overhead.

When, if ever, would you pee sitting down?

When I need to take a [poop]. Or I guess if I’m dying. Like having trouble standing up.

You don’t ever join me in peeing in our yard. What’s up with that?

I like being in comfort?

Do you undo your pants, or just undo the fly?

Personal preference, depends on the guy. I usually undo the button because my pants are tight enough that they won’t fall down, but plenty of guys just unzip the fly.

Realistically, would you notice if a trans guy used a urinal next to you in a bathroom?

How would I know? There’s a whole lot of dude etiquette here. You don’t look over at another man’s junk. So how would I know?

But if you did notice, would it bother you that a trans guy was in there?

No. But admitting that I noticed would be admitting that I looked, so again, how do I know?

Would it be weird if you went on a hike or road trip with a girl and she peed standing up?

If she gave me a heads up that she was using a device, I’d certainly have no problem with it. I could see a lot of guys being freaked out if they saw her pee standing up and didn’t mention the device.

What would you say to a guy who felt bad that his girlfriend was using an STP?

Why the f--- do you care bro? It’s kind of like guys who don’t like tampons. You don’t have to take a huge interest in it, but why do you care?

Am I still cute even if I pee standing up?

No, I’m sorry, it was over the moment you did it once. [Laughs] Of course!

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